• At some point in the past, this person was (arguably) your best friend.
• You and this person once competed for the same woman, and you both failed.
• You have punched this person in the face.
• If invited, you would go to this person’s wedding and give them a spice rack, but you would secretly hope that their marriage ends in a bitter, public divorce.
• People who barely know the two of you assume you are close friends; people who know both of you intimately suspect you profoundly hate each other.
• If your archenemy tried to kill you, this person would attempt to stop him.

One of my favorites from Chuck Klosterman IV:A Decade of Curious People and Dangerous Ideas (and the root of all the nemesis vs. archenemy discussions I’ve had)

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